- You’re always accusing me of it. If I’m already getting treated like I’m cheating on you– why not do it and prove you right? You always think you’re right anyway.
- When you met me, I was with another woman. This is karma at its finest. What I’ll do WITH you, I’ll do TO you.
- You don’t do the things you used to do. You would cook at least 5 nights a week. Now, McDonalds knows what I’m going to ask for before I place my order.
- You reject my advances in bed. My sexy female co-workers are ALWAYS flirting with me. I don’t HAVE to come home to your rejection.
- You’re slacking on your appearance. You were in shape when we first got together. Now, you’re JUST a shape – a circle, to be exact.
- You let our love life become your whole life and now depend on me for everything. If you caught me cheating – then what? You’re not going anywhere.
- Sometimes, I just want to know that I’ve still got it. You never compliment me. Knowing I can conquer another woman really boosts my ego.
- Its so easy to do. You think I spend hours on Facebook checking on my cousins’ lives? No! I’m waiting for Big Booty Judy to accept my friend request.
- I need variety in the bed. You never want to switch things up. Its like pizza. I love pizza, but don’t want it EVERY night.
- I’m a man. I REALLY don’t need a reason. The last 9 things were just excuses.
Sorry, (that I got caught)